I went maternity clothes shopping today. I have tried it before, but had trouble b/c I wasn't really showing and felt it to be frivolous. I'm not a shopper anyway. I get bored in about 5 minutes. But, my sister got me a gift certificate, and my friend Erin, pretty much a professional shopper, was eager to accompany me as my personal shopping assistant. So we went.
The store was not that large. I remember thinking as I entered, "I doubt I'll be able to spend my gift certificate here." Left to my own devices, I would've probably bought a couple stretchy tees from the clearance rack, a couple bras for my own growing rack, and I would've called it a day, with my wardrobe no better off than when I started and an odd remaining balance on the gift card.
Thank god for Erin. She kept me busy. She brought shirts and skirts and dresses and pants. She encouraged me to try on the stretchy-belly pants that I thought I loathed. I was strictly AGAINST them. They just look so silly with that extra piece of elastic around the waste. On the hanger is just flops over, looking excessive and strange.
Wow, was I ever wrong. Those pants are soooo comfortable. It's like a soft, supportive hug for my growing belly. I can bend over without flashing my undies to the world. I can lean forward without the waste of my pants digging into my stomach. They "smooth everything out" as the saleslady said. I love them. I bought two pair.
In the end, I spent all of my sister's generous gift certificate, plus some extra of my own money. I eventually had to stop Erin from bringing me more candidates. I rarely wear skirts or dresses, so buying one of each was plenty. I tried on more than a dozen dress up items. "Enough!" I said to her, laughing, but loving her good taste and attentiveness.
I had more fun shopping (and bought more clothes) than I have in the last 5 years combined. But it was worth it for the comfort and feel-good factor.
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Grow, baby, grow!
I'm more than 21 weeks now. Past the halfway point. I'm showing, but still not enough for the average stranger to be sure I'm not just weird-shaped and chubby. But it feels real now..."it" being the idea that I'm pregnant, not the baby inside. We don't have to say "it" anymore because we had our ultrasound. We're having a little girl. A little girl. And as one of my best friends, Jenny, pointed out, "It just feels right that you're having a girl." She said this mainly to honor my mom, who died of ovarian cancer in 2003. The baby will have my mom's name, June, as her middle name. But that's as far as we've gotten in the naming business. Lots of ideas floating around, but none I'm ready to share or commit to.
You see, we didn't really expect a girl. The deciding genetic material comes from the father, and the last 3 generations of Richter males created only...Richter males. I have a lovely and wonderful sister-in-law, begotten by adoption. So I was expecting a boy. But a little girl...? It took awhile for that to sink in, but I am oh, so happy about it. And I think Dave is proud of himself for breaking the all-boy trend. We're bringing the first grandchild into the family (on both sides) and the first biological daughter to top it off.
The ultrasound helped me connect what I've been feeling to her actual movements. Right now, we're calling her "Wiggles" because she is a squirmy, active little thing. Even at the ultrasound, she was doing sommersaults and moving from one side of my uterus to the other. I saw the little, gray, skeletal-looking images twitching around and I realized this was an actual child inside me. And now I'm hyper-sensitive to her movement. She's most active from about noon to the evening time. She seems to know when my bladder is full, and she likes jumping around on it. Already, Dave has gotten to feel some subtle movements through my belly. She's strong. A hard little ball of wiggly child that likes to hang out in my lower abdomen. I, and a couple of my students who have ventured to touch my belly, are surprised at how solid the mass is. Not the fleshy, squishy feel you might expect, but a firm baby ball.
I swim once a week, and last Friday, as I was doing laps, I could feel her- a warm, solid ball in my tummy. She's quiet when I swim, no wiggling around, and I like to imagine what she might be feeling or thinking. I'm sure I'm projecting much more intelligence than she is currently capable of, but it's a bonding experience for me. I can imagine it's just me and her in the pool, quietly coasting in the water. I can't wait to meet her.
You see, we didn't really expect a girl. The deciding genetic material comes from the father, and the last 3 generations of Richter males created only...Richter males. I have a lovely and wonderful sister-in-law, begotten by adoption. So I was expecting a boy. But a little girl...? It took awhile for that to sink in, but I am oh, so happy about it. And I think Dave is proud of himself for breaking the all-boy trend. We're bringing the first grandchild into the family (on both sides) and the first biological daughter to top it off.
The ultrasound helped me connect what I've been feeling to her actual movements. Right now, we're calling her "Wiggles" because she is a squirmy, active little thing. Even at the ultrasound, she was doing sommersaults and moving from one side of my uterus to the other. I saw the little, gray, skeletal-looking images twitching around and I realized this was an actual child inside me. And now I'm hyper-sensitive to her movement. She's most active from about noon to the evening time. She seems to know when my bladder is full, and she likes jumping around on it. Already, Dave has gotten to feel some subtle movements through my belly. She's strong. A hard little ball of wiggly child that likes to hang out in my lower abdomen. I, and a couple of my students who have ventured to touch my belly, are surprised at how solid the mass is. Not the fleshy, squishy feel you might expect, but a firm baby ball.
I swim once a week, and last Friday, as I was doing laps, I could feel her- a warm, solid ball in my tummy. She's quiet when I swim, no wiggling around, and I like to imagine what she might be feeling or thinking. I'm sure I'm projecting much more intelligence than she is currently capable of, but it's a bonding experience for me. I can imagine it's just me and her in the pool, quietly coasting in the water. I can't wait to meet her.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
It's always sunny at the pregnancy parade...
"I have something to tell you." I was talking to my friend Georgia, around week 12. Though she used to work in mybuilding, she now came only a few times a year for training. I hadn't seen her 2 months. During one of her training breaks, I pulled her upstairs with me.
"You're pregnant," she said.
"Yeah...how did you..."
"I am too."
As it turns out, our due dates are 3 days apart. This is Georgia's 2nd child. She was already showing. I wasn't.
It struck me then and has many times since, how there was no sense of "raining on my parade" or "stealing my thunder." You can't rain on the pregnancy parade. You can just join in and make it merrier. I always knew the pregnancy club existed. For years I've known members without any personal desire to join. But now that I'm a part of it, I feel instant kinship with anyone in the group. Non-pregnant people are bound to get bored or weirded out by hearing about how your clothes are fitting, or food cravings, or the strange things going on with your nipples. But I've found pregnant, or recently pregnant, women can talk about pregnancy indefinitely, and without any sense of the competitiveness or "one-upmanship" that comes with other accomplishments.
Perhaps one of the biggest, and most pleasant surprises, is that pregnancy is FUN. I love the excuse to eat the extra helping of a good dinner. I like the motivation to do healthy things. I like the curiousity of the unpregnant, the unsolicited advice and the frequent questions.
Another amazing thing: think about how many pregnant women you've known. Think about how many you've seen, both in real-life and on TV. Pregnancy is hardly a mystery, and before I was pregnant, it almost felt familiar. It's not a strange or rare condition.
But it is special. And no matter how much you think you know about it, nothing diminishes the awe and excitement of going through the process. As my body grows and changes, as I expand without any sense of control, as I feel the strange stretching and tinglings in my body, I can't help but be completely taken by surprise by how it just happens. Even now, almost halfway through, it seems surreal to me. It's hard to see beyond the next steps. Right now, I'm focused on my upcoming ultrasound. People have started asking me where I'm registered, what I'm going to do about work, what is our nursery going to look like, what kind of car seat are we going to buy...and I can only shrug and say, "We haven't gotten there yet." Of course we've thought about it. I'm reading. I'm asking around. I'm doing my research, but my focus is on how to hide the unbuttoned top button of my jeans, and wondering if strangers can tell I'm pregnant or just think I've got a pooch.
I keep thinking that once I know whether it's a boy or girl, I can start visualizing and bonding with this child in a real way. We can give it a plausible name, rather than silly nicknames like Ninja or Mango or Squirt. I can slowly begin picking out clothes and toys and books. I don't want to rush through this pregnancy, but I want to wallow in it to feel all the textures and nuances. I want to cherish my husband's hand on my growing belly, the little flutters that make me wonder if I'm feeling movement or just gas, my students' stolen glances at my waistline, the fear and the wonder and the joy of what is happening. I want to enjoy these things, because I know how life goes. It goes fast. And before I know it, pregnancy will be over, and then I'll be on to the real next adventure.
"You're pregnant," she said.
"Yeah...how did you..."
"I am too."
As it turns out, our due dates are 3 days apart. This is Georgia's 2nd child. She was already showing. I wasn't.
It struck me then and has many times since, how there was no sense of "raining on my parade" or "stealing my thunder." You can't rain on the pregnancy parade. You can just join in and make it merrier. I always knew the pregnancy club existed. For years I've known members without any personal desire to join. But now that I'm a part of it, I feel instant kinship with anyone in the group. Non-pregnant people are bound to get bored or weirded out by hearing about how your clothes are fitting, or food cravings, or the strange things going on with your nipples. But I've found pregnant, or recently pregnant, women can talk about pregnancy indefinitely, and without any sense of the competitiveness or "one-upmanship" that comes with other accomplishments.
Perhaps one of the biggest, and most pleasant surprises, is that pregnancy is FUN. I love the excuse to eat the extra helping of a good dinner. I like the motivation to do healthy things. I like the curiousity of the unpregnant, the unsolicited advice and the frequent questions.
Another amazing thing: think about how many pregnant women you've known. Think about how many you've seen, both in real-life and on TV. Pregnancy is hardly a mystery, and before I was pregnant, it almost felt familiar. It's not a strange or rare condition.
But it is special. And no matter how much you think you know about it, nothing diminishes the awe and excitement of going through the process. As my body grows and changes, as I expand without any sense of control, as I feel the strange stretching and tinglings in my body, I can't help but be completely taken by surprise by how it just happens. Even now, almost halfway through, it seems surreal to me. It's hard to see beyond the next steps. Right now, I'm focused on my upcoming ultrasound. People have started asking me where I'm registered, what I'm going to do about work, what is our nursery going to look like, what kind of car seat are we going to buy...and I can only shrug and say, "We haven't gotten there yet." Of course we've thought about it. I'm reading. I'm asking around. I'm doing my research, but my focus is on how to hide the unbuttoned top button of my jeans, and wondering if strangers can tell I'm pregnant or just think I've got a pooch.
I keep thinking that once I know whether it's a boy or girl, I can start visualizing and bonding with this child in a real way. We can give it a plausible name, rather than silly nicknames like Ninja or Mango or Squirt. I can slowly begin picking out clothes and toys and books. I don't want to rush through this pregnancy, but I want to wallow in it to feel all the textures and nuances. I want to cherish my husband's hand on my growing belly, the little flutters that make me wonder if I'm feeling movement or just gas, my students' stolen glances at my waistline, the fear and the wonder and the joy of what is happening. I want to enjoy these things, because I know how life goes. It goes fast. And before I know it, pregnancy will be over, and then I'll be on to the real next adventure.
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